Happy New Year, humans! Did you stay up till midnight? My friends and I got together and had a dino-opoly competition, ate prehistoric pizza, and watched Drawassic Park. But it’s a new year now and that means…
358 DAYS TILL NEXT CHRISTMAS!
No, seriously, it actually means my inbox is flooded with fitness advertisements (I will ignore the fact that I weigh 3,698 more pounds than you) until February hits and then that fitness will be abolished with chocolate ads.
But the main thing it means is that I have a fresh new adventure ahead of me. All the bad things of last year are behind me—the typos, plot holes, and brain blocks. I want 2019 to be better than ever. I want to smile brighter, write better, and sit harder on Mariposa. I hope you’ll join me this year as I solemnly resolve to:
1. Craft characters with realistic flaws, emotions, and stupidity.
2. Proofread my proofreading.
3. Have fun while I’m miserable, have fun while I’m making my characters miserable, and have a blast while I’m making my readers miserable.
4. Spark ideas when my creativity is stranded in the middle of the ocean with no mind matches.
5. Stop pounding my head so I can buy books instead of aspirin.
6. Receive criticism graciously before erupting.
7. Read terrible books to avoiding falling into the same terribleness.
8. Remember that I will be a rich and famous writer after I’m dead and the money will do me no good.
9. Stop marketing my books like a Jehovah witness.
10. Burn my first drafts.
11. Learn the difference between actually writing and having my story’s folder open while I’m looking at social media.
12. Edit like I’m not watching.
13. Cut all the unnecessary scenes I think are necessary.
14. Get someone to read my blog who isn’t a friend, family member, or grandma who got lost in the Google search results.
15. Write the way I want to until someone tells me to write another way.
16. Create villains who readers will hate so much that they’ll buy pillows with their picture on it.
17. Become a better reader, writer, and eater.
18. Resolve to unresolve all the above resolutions.