Guess what (why do people even ask that because no one ever guesses anyway)? I was tagged—again. And all thanks to Jenna and the random person who created the tag (and who I don’t even know but I’m thanking anyway)!
But this tag is better than the last one, because it presents me with the opportunity to talk about myself without boring you with a monologue on my life’s history.
Vital Stats and Appearance (Because My Profile Pic and Bio Is Apparently Not Enough)
Name: Aberdeen the Authorosaurus (not sure where my parents got the idea to name their kid with the middle name “the”)
Nickname: Some people call me Ab, others call me Berdie, and some call me dumb.
Birthday: August 22, 2012
Hair color/length: I don’t have hair, and if I did I’d be worried.
Eye color: Blue, but it turns a terrifying red every time a camera flashes.
Braces/piercing/tattoos: Seriously, why would I want to mar my perfect scales with tattoos?
Righty or lefty: Neither. My hands are helpless at the mercy of my short arms.
Ethnicity: I’m almost a pure Authorosaurian, though I have a wee bit of Editmontosaurus in me.
First novel written: Berfurd Goes for a Stomp
First book completed: How to Train Your Human: A Dinosaur’s Guide to Getting a Writer off the Floor and Back to the Keyboard (working title)
Award for writing: In 2017, I won the National Pen Sharpening Award.
First publication: The Lava Literary Journal for Explosive Minds (It was an article about sparking imagination.)
Conferences: The Alabookma Authorosaurus’s Conference
Query/pitch: “This all-inclusive guide is the perfect resource for dinosaurs who have grumpy, lazy, depressed writers who won’t listen to reason. Includes foolproof methods for revitalizing the human brain, spawning ideas, and short-circuiting their internet so they’ll stop looking at social media.”
Novel (that you wrote): Raiders of the Lost Arc
Genre: Edible (aka any well-written book)
Author: Dr. Saurus
Writing music: The Prehistoric Players Family Orchestra
Time to write: Early morning, midmorning, late morning, before noon, after noon, early evening, late evening, midnight, low night, high night, and any time except when I’m eating (because that’s more important than writing).
Writing snack/drink: Ink and a good book
Movie: Drawassic Park
Writing memory: The look on Mariposa’s face when I came stomping into her office for the first time. She initially sued me for breaking down the building, but after all the court procedures, she came to the conclusion that she liked me. Been a long time since she’s come to that conclusion again.
Childhood book: Humpty Dumpty (my theory is that he was so big because he was a dinosaur egg)
Reading: Robot Rawrs
Writing: This blogpost
Listening to: The pounding of my boss lady’s head on her desk
Watching: Her run to the cupboard to get some pain medicine
Learning: That it is not a good idea to pound your head on a desk
Want to be published: No, I want to remain anonymous and poor for the the rest of my life.
Indie or traditional: My decision rests in how many rejection letters my doctor thinks my health can handle.
Wildest goal: Eat a whole library
Now that you know about me, which is undoubtedly interesting, I’ll proceed to introduce you to my boss lady, who is undoubtedly less interesting.
Vital Stats and Appearance
Name: Mariposa Aristeo
Nickname: Mari, Squishy, Snitch, and Doodlebug (yes, you are quite welcome to inquire as to how she was ever christened any of those titles).
Birthday: None of your business (translation: she’s never actually told me).
Hair color/length: Brown and short. (Do you humans really measure your hair? Because that is…time consuming.)
Eye color: Brown
Braces/piercing/tattoos: Do ink marks from drawing count?
Righty or lefty: She’s not right-handed. She’s not left handed. She’s BOTH. Comes in handy for Foosball.
First novel written: Ann’s Adventure. To quote the first few sentences word for word: “Once upon a time there lived a Girl. And she loved to draw. but there was somthing she wanted to do more. She want to be an arthor. but couse when she rote on paper it did not soud very good.” I’m not sure whether I should laugh or cry at that last horribly written sentence, which somehow manages to accurately depict the writer’s struggle.
First novel completed: In All Circumstances (which circumstantially was stuffed in the back of her virtual file cabinet due to the sudden realization that it was rotten).
Award for writing: I’m her assistant, aren’t I? That should be award enough.
First publication: Kingdom Pen. Her second publication was Kingdom Pen. Her third publication was Kingdom Pen. Let’s just say she never let their inbox become empty…
Conferences: The only conference she went to, she didn’t really go to, so I’m not sure that counts.
Query/pitch: A lot of pitches, but no home runs yet.
Novel (that she wrote): The one she’s writing, which will undoubtedly change when she starts writing a new one.
Author: Charles Spurgeon and John MacArthur
Writing music: Dinosaur soundtrack, Jurassic Park soundtrack, Up soundtrack, and “When We’re Together” from the Toy Story 3 soundtrack
Time to write: Any hour before 8:00 p.m.; after that her brain blanks out.
Writing snack/drink: She doesn’t snack; she was born with a stomach five sizes too small.
Movie: Anything that has the Disney stamp of approval
Writing memory: When she started a blog with a group of friends and suddenly discovered writing was not a torture device invented by adults. Later, as a practical joke, she wrote a silly story, highlighting their favorite inside jokes and posted it on the blog. The practical joke was the most practical thing she ever wrote because several years later the silliness turned to seriousness and spawned the best story idea she ever had.
Childhood book: Amelia’s Notebooks
Reading: A collection of sermons by Charles Spurgeon, The Hidden Magic of Walt Disney World, and Answers Magazine.
Writing: Nothing (unfortunately)
Listening to: Jasmine Murray, Walt Disney Records: The Legacy Collection Disneyland, and Christmas music.
Watching: Little House on the Prairie, Daniel Boone, and Leave it to Beaver
Learning: That if her book isn’t published soon, nobody’s gonna die (except me—because I live off her writing).
Want to be published: I’ll ask her.
Indie or traditional: That depends on her mood for the day.
Wildest goal: Write, illustrate, and publish her own children’s book that people of every age will enjoy for generations.
Now that you’ve read the interesting and less interesting part, I come to the most interesting part: tagging other bloggers. But before I name them, here are the tag rules:
• Link back to the person who created the tag.
• Thank the person who tagged you.
• Share the tag graphic
• Tag eleven bloggers
So I proudly tag (I am well aware that this list does not constitute 11 bloggers—I like to break rules, and even more so when all the bloggers I know have already been tagged):
This tag is non-negotiable. You are required to participate (however, if you send some tasty books my way, I may just happen to overlook the discrepancy and pretend I never tagged you). As for those seven bloggers I didn’t tag, please feel free to help me out by doing the tag yourself.